Currently Gaming Halo 2 By Microsoft see related

The Lambda Chi Alpha Halo 2 Tournament...

So yeah... sitting here at the Halo 2 tournament that the Lambda Chi's are hosting in ADUC... and I've done nothing but pay 10 dollars to be in the "1 on 1" tournament. For some stupid reason, they decided to start with the 4 on 4, then 2 on 2, and finally 1 on 1, even though most people are only doing the team matches. I guess I should've gotten a team together, but I don't know that many people that play Halo decently... or at least I thought.

Many of the people here are geeks of course... not band geeks... they aren't that prestigious. There are a few people that are here that I do know in some form or fashion. Of course, the Lambda Chi's are here. There are various college students, and even some high/middle school kids. A couple professors are watching and taking advantage of the free food. Not only are these people here, but some nicknamed people are too. "Suck-up" from mine and Steph's Media Lit class is here, screaming cuss words like a maniac. "Stacey's Stalker" is here, due to the fact that the Eagle Mafia, who will not exist as of next semester, funded the food for the event. And finally, "Sweat Pants Boy" is here with his socks and sandals, but without his sweatpants. I suppose it's too hot for him to wear them... Apparently though, he has a family. He has a brother in the tournament, as well as a mom, and both of them look half-way normal. I have also come up with a new nickname for somebody. "Stuck-up Douchebag Boy" is down here. He has really short blond hair, dresses metrosexually, and thinks he's the bomb at everything. However, he actually blows at seemingly everything. It makes me laugh.

Anyway, I guess I'll go. Hopefully sometime within the next year or so I'll be able to kiss some ass on Halo.

Scooter

Currently Watching Married with Children - The Complete Third Season By Married With Children see related

Spring Break... I've sat at home in pain due to my stupid wisdom teeth being removed, with no Steph here to take care of me... all I have right now is my pills, which make me high. Yay!

During this time, especially today since I've been less high than previously, I've been thinking about different things. I've been mainly thinking about myself and my relationship with Stephanie. I'm going to admit a few things about myself, what's been going on, why I have been acting certain ways, and whatever else I can speak of.

I've not really been myself lately. I've been more of a frustrated, annoying, pissed off jackass of a person. I've been a jerk to people who really don't deserve it. I've gotten into more arguments recently than I ever have. I've lost much of my determination to do things in life. I'm at the biggest weight in my life. I've been thinking about why all this has occured, and I think it has to do with the level of pressure and stress I've put on myself. I seem to believe that I need to be the absolute best at everything I do. I want to be the best... have the best grades, get the best comments from people, have the best job, whatever it is. I want to impress everybody. I want people to say, "Man, that guy has his stuff together. He's freakin' awesome," when they talk about me. I've put so much pressure on myself to achieve so many goals to be the best, that I've lost track of how I should be as a person.

I've realized that I get mad easier, I cuss more, I'm not close enough with God, I'm not being who I need to be anymore. I've lost myself. To the people that have been effected by this: my friends, my roommates, my really close friends, my family, my not-so-close-anymore friends, myself, and Stephanie, especially Stephanie, I'm truly sorry. I've screwed up majorly, and it took me too long to figure out exactly what has gone wrong. Now that I feel I've figured it out, I'm wanting to change. I need to be a better person overall, and I promise that I will get myself to where I need to be in life.

This next little bit is just for Stephanie.

Baby, I know you are gone right now on your trip, and you won't get to read this until you get back to school. I just want to let you know how much you mean to me. My life is just not complete without you in it. You make life so special. I admit that I'm a jealous person. But, I'm not just jealous of those guys that you met during your trip. I'm jealous of everybody that is on that trip with you, even President Andrews, Ayla, and Stacey. They get to be there with you and enjoy your presence. I truly thought that I'd be ok during this Spring Break. Last year we had only been dating a little over 3 months at the time, and I hadn't really been seperate from you since November. This school year we haven't seen as much of each other due to different activities the both of us have had, mainly with you being in Delta Zeta... and I'm not bashing the DZ's at all. I think joining DZ has been a very good thing for you. We just haven't been as connected to the hip as we have been in the past. So, this Spring Break I thought because we haven't been around each other all the time that I'd be able to handle myself ok without you. Stephanie, I'm probably just as bad this year as I was last year, if not worse. Baby, I miss you so much right now. I wish I could talk to you right now, to be able to hold you in my arms, kiss you ever so sweetly, and tell you how much I love you. You mean the world to me, and right now my world is empty without you. And I don't mean this to upset you either. I don't want you to think you are horrible because you went on this trip and left me here by myself. Baby, you deserved to go, and you needed to go just so you could relax. My biggest fear in life is my fear of losing you. I don't ever want to lose you. As happy as you make me, I'd just be devestated if I ever lost you. I don't deserve life to be as sweet as you make it. You make life so much more beautiful than I ever dreamed possible. I just miss you so much right now. I love you so much Stephanie!

As I said before, I've really gone off path with the way I need to be in life. I've treated people worse than what they deserve, and I'm sorry to everybody that I've done that to, especially Stephanie.

Scott

Currently Gaming XB360 Project Gotham Racing 3 By Microsoft Software see related

I admit it... I changed this site to the same layout as my old one... I just missed it.... And besides, black fits me better than white... and Stewie is my idol.

I have beaten not only Need For Speed: Most Wanted, but I've also beaten Call of Duty 2. I'm now working on PGR 3, which is becoming more and more annoying to me... but oh well.

I've applied to become a RA on campus... I hope I get the job. I have my interview next Thursday. I had to get 3 references, two of which I know are freakin' awesome thank to Tre and Bev. I would've had three, but a certain fat band director wouldn't answer my email... freakin' jerk. Let's just say, I'm pissed at you Will.

So yeah... my life has been interesting... at least from the inside. I'm really down on myself right now. I'm not able to enjoy some things that I like anymore, like chicken wings. I'm stressed out on my money situation, because the truth is, I'm extremely low on money. I'm not finding things very funny anymore like I used to. I think I'm a fat slob who's not going anywhere in life. I have no confidence in myself at all. I don't think I make Stephanie happy anymore, even though I would love to. I feel like the friends I have aren't really my friends... they just put up with me. I'm afraid my grades are going to be bad this semester. And to be perfectly honest, I feel like I'm a failure. I wish I could just make Stephanie happy to where I can keep her, and that I could feel better about myself. I hoping all this is is that I'm just stressing myself over trivial stuff. But I really do need to lose weight. I'm at the biggest weight of my life. It's unhealthy that I'm so overweight. I guess I'm just a big loser... a big fat one... but I don't know. I'm probably just being stupid... but for some reason I don't think I am this time...

Oh well, I'm a little tired...

Scooter

Currently Listening Final Fantasy VII By Nobuo Uematsu Let The Battles Begin see related

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

Happy Valentine's Day to all! Hope your boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives, partners, or whatever you are close with got you something good. I know I did... In fact, I'm wearing them... Dale Earnhardt boxers! It's odd though, considering I have Dale Earnhardt on my crotch...

Hmm... let's see... 2 days until the Twin 150's... that means 5 days until the Daytona 500!!! And Jimmie Johnson's crew chief can't be there... he got suspended for cheating. And don't expect Johnson to win, because as the old saying goes, cheaters never win.

I beat Need For Speed the other day. So, now I'm into the Campaign mode of Halo 2... then I guess I'll probably play WWE, Call of Duty, or Project Gotham...

Supposedly, MySpace is the way to go these days according to Steph and Stacey... I'm thinking not. Every freakin' time I go to that site, no matter what computer I'm on, it is the slowest piece of crap. I think it hates me... like most other things.

I think I daydream too much...

I have a test tomorrow in Management... I haven't studied... And I'm not planning to until tomorrow around noon.

I think I'm going to go.

Quote of the Day: "I heard that, jackass!"

Scooter

Currently Reading Business Communication : Process and Product (with InfoTrac) By Mary Ellen Guffey see related

So yeah... sitting in Business Communications... wanting to die!!! I have every bit of my homework caught up... I want food... well, not really.

Man, I worked out yesterday at the Wellness Center... Worked on my pecs and abs... and my glutes... and I'm hurting right now. I have to stay in an upright position. If I bend in anyway, I hurt. But like they say, no pain, no gain.

I've almost beat Need For Speed: Most Wanted. I'm on the last guy, Razor. I think I'll be beating him tonight since I have only one thing to do tonight and that is type up something for Stats... which I'm not getting into... bad topic.

I swear Dr. Iwu is the stupidest guy in this class right now... and we have some pretty stupid people.

Oh, and Tre just got up and walked out.

Looks like I'm not joining a frat this semester for some reasons... part of which is money... others I won't say. But I think I'll end up joining one next semester.

Less than two weeks until the Daytona 500!!!!!!!!

I saw a video yesterday from EBaums World that had a guy that actually ate crap! No joke. Probably the grossest thing I've ever seen.

Quote of the Day: "Are you lactating?"

Scooter